In an amazing show of what one developmentally disabled person can do, a woman was granted the right to wear a spaghetti strainer on her head in a driver’s license photo.
The woman claimed that she was a “Pastafarian.”
Pastafarianism is a “religious movement” that consist of members with a BMI of 31 or larger and haven’t been paying attention to anything trendy on social media for close to 10 years. Synonymous with Aspergers in recent years, the Pastafarian population has increased dramatically with the widespread availability of social media to the mentally disabled.
Rarely employed, these people roam the internet taking aim at anything even remotely religious. They attack Christians, Muslims and even the Jews. Many claim to also be of the “Atheist” faith, holding both religious emblems around their necks at once. A giant spaghetti creature that looks like it tumbled off of the schoolhouse all covered with cheese, and a downwards pentagram.
Scientists have recently tried to get to the bottom of Pastafarianism and why people would ever associate with such an outdated and lame movement.
They had compiled a survey with some pretty surprising results:
What is your favorite food?
What is your favorite comedy quote from a movie?
What is your favorite exercise?
The results speak for themselves. The Pastafarian population of the US exists for no reason other than to ridicule Christian, Muslim and Jewish populations with an abomination of religion that really grew old and tired ten years ago. Thankfully, these men and women have something other than Atheism to hold on to.
The Pastafarians may be developmentally disabled and mostly diagnosed with Aspergers and/or Type 2 Diabetes, but the Atheists are the ones who, through their love for Satan, will suffer the most in the afterlife.